Tuesday, 22 January 2013

King Carlos of Spain Makes Call to Arms in Unprecedented Address.

(Madrid) SM Press

In a speech given on National television King Juan Carlos of Spain has made an unprecedented call to arms conscripting the unemployed into military service and launching an attack against the British on disputed Gibraltar.

In light of recent scandals within the Spanish political system, King Carlos, in an unprecedented move presented a comprehensive plan to deal with Spain's internal problems. Coming off the heels of a 75th birthday speech which garnered a mixed response, King Carlos heralded a 'call to arms' in order to 'unify Spain in the face of corruption and high unemployment.'

'What we need is renewed faith in our country and our political system' King Carlos spoke as he addressed a packed audience at the Palacio Real de Madrid.

The King, dressed in full regalia, outlined a conscription plan aimed at dealing with high unemployment, he also presented plans for re-industrializing Spain, and settling old scores.

'Our first score to settle is with ourselves.' The King noted as he outlined a plan to deal with internal corruption within the political system. 'By re-instituting the monarchy as our form of government I can assure you, examples will be made of the people who are responsible or are implicated in corruption and conspiracy.'

He then went on to launch a derisive torrent of rhetoric directed toward the British Royal Family and asserted that Spanish forces were set to re-conquer Gibraltar within moments of his speech. 'The House of Windsor are uppity, besides I know they're German Saxe-Coburg-Gotha usurpers who need to go back to the forests from which they came.'

The King went on to issue what some have called veiled warnings directed towards Argentina and other former South American colonies.

'Of course we must re-assert our interests abroad by protecting our companies abroad. Arbitrary nationalization of Spanish companies will no longer be tolerated.'

The broadcast which lasted a whole of ten minutes aired shortly after Spanish security forces rolled into Barcelona and other 'areas of strategical importance' within Catalonia. A spokesman for the monarchy stated this was 'a unique internal security issue', yet many observers contend that the forces are there to contain a possible Catalonian separatist uprising.

The British government has yet to respond. As of this report it is rumored that the peninnsula of Gibraltar, garrisoned with minimal British forces has capitulated with little to no resistance.


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